I hear women around me all the time saying she would place “financial independence” in the top 3 or top 2 criteria for starting a relationship with a man. Yet most women here on GWS seem offended when men say women look for money.
Isn’t ”financially independent” just a polite way of saying he has to have a big wallet?
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Sometimes yes and sometimes no.
There are many women who only paper chasing.
But there are many more who just want a man with a steady job.
Doesn’t matter how many 0’s are at the end of his paycheck.
As long as he doesn’t work at a McDonalds.
And money’s not the only thing that matters.
There’s also looks and personality.
No, we just want someone who works and cares enough about having a paycheck unlike having a bum laying on the couch all day and having to go to the food line for crumbs. I don’t want a guy that sponges off his parents either. I can think of other places that size may be of more concern to me. Thank You
Financially independent not to take his wife’s own money or call up his mother at 3 a.m.: “Mom, I need $10 for a bottle of beer.”
Many women don’t want to depend on a man for financial security. It is easier to work and make your own money, then a woman doesn’t feel so dependent on him. I could have cared less if my husband was financially secure when we married, and trust me he was far from that. I would rather be with a man I was happy with and had thing in common with than marry someone because they are financially secure. As long as he had a job I really don’t care.
Not just a big wallet, but a job, his own home and self sufficient. No woman wants a man who can’t pay his own way, slouches. To many momma boys in the world, will the real men please stand up.
“Financially independent” was something that I had on my list of requirements when I was still dating. Perhaps my definition of this is different than other’s. To me, “financially independent” means has a job, gets a weekly paycheck, has a running (not necessarily new) vehicle, has a place of his own (not a room at mom’s). Now the kind of job is unimportant to me, just the fact that he works. The paycheck doesn’t have to be 4 figures, just enough to cover normal bills. The car does not have to be new or status show, just a decent vehicle that gets from A to B, in fact a good used car that is paid for is the best. And a place of his own means that he is not dependent on family to live, roommates are okay and to be expected, especially if the guys are divorced and paying child support. Having roommates is the only way a lot of divorced fathers can make it, I have a lot of respect for men who stand up to their child support responsibilities.
So when I met my husband, I ascertained that he had a job. He had the same job for the past 7 years. He picked my up in a 10 year old paid for Jimmy. He shared a nice apartment with another friend who was divorced. Hence he was financially independent. Not rich, not well-off, just a hard-working responsible man whom i could respect.
Not all women look for money in a man but from my experience most of them do, practically to the point of gold diggerism(is that a real word?)
Well, anyway you know what I mean. I’m a woman and I don’t look for the money. I don’t understand why these women think they are so special that they have to be taken care of instead of getting a job and pitching in. They are not a credit to our gender!
I’m sort of not looking for money, I’m looking for a hard worker and that is responsible with their money and knows how to handle it.
Seen it used by women in two different contexts…
Some women, it means just that…she wants a guy who’s employed, out his own, and not doing stupid things with his credit(which can and will bite her in the ass should it turn into a long term thing)
These gals, plan on working and bringing in their own income…so it’s more trying to find an equal partner rather then someone she gets to take care of.
Also from traditional minded ladies, it seems to mean more..as she is hoping to secure a man and become a SAH/M. She’s got to find someone who’s financially secure..for his income will be all they have, so it’s got to be good.
So there are two very different mind sets out there when it comes to women and men’s money. (well ok three mindsets… there are the golddiggers..who are exclusively looking for cash)
I agree that SOME women care only about money. That’s the only reason Donald Trump can get women and that old playboy guy. But most, normal girls don’t really care. I mean, we don’t him to be broke, but money’s never been something I’ve discussed with my boyfriends.
If I say I want a financially independent man, I mean that I don’t want him to be living with his parents. If I can own my house and have a job to support myself, I expect the same from the guy I’m with.
No, it means she doesn’t want some 35 year old who works at McDonald’s and lives in his parents basement.
Those types of people show NO ambition in life.
If he has no ambition in his own life, why would anyone think for a second he’d put forth the ambition to work at a relationship.
In my case, “financially independent” means he can afford to pay for all of his living expenses by himself, or at least he’s working toward that; I wouldn’t want to be with someone who intended to mooch off other people for the rest of his life. If he were actually rich, I’d stay away from him.
You know…when my female friends and I used to sit around and swap stories about guys we liked, absolutely none of the assets we talked about involved economics.
“Financially Independent” is not ‘just a polite way of saying he has…a bit wallet.”
Financially Independent goes both ways…it mean no one is going to have to pay the way for the other. It means having *some* job and being adult enough to take care of yourself.
When I was young, I never considered anything about a man except whether I found him attractive or not. I had no interest in his financial status whatsoever. Men were just sex objects to me.
‘Financial independence’ is a rather vague term anyway, I am not sure what it means. I had financial independence when I was young for instance, that is, I earned enough money to support myself – just – but no more than that.
I don’t think that is necessarily what it means. I think what they actually mean is that he has finally broken the apron strings and doesn’t have to ask his mother and father for everything, including money and permission.
Some men, when they get married, don’t know how to write a check, and how to balance a checkbook, let alone change a lightbulb.